The core idea here is solid, but the writing and layout makes this a flawed product. The sentence structure is off, and some don't really make sense. The story itself could be really interesting, but it also feels a little too much like a railroad. The Giovanni are a great clan, and using them as a focus caught my attention, but these characters fall flat and I'm not really interested in their backstory.
To the author; I think it would be good to have an editor for your future products, they can help get your writing a little tighter, and offer some suggestions. Try and create set pieces for your chronicle's, places, locations, and events to drop in, but provide the frameworks and let the ST use that framework as a hopping off point.
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